Stories

Billy Hamhead By Darren Hello my name is Billy Hamhead. I’m here to tell you about the epic battle between Sebastian Trashcan and myself. The battle is for the king of Hamworld. Before I tell you about the battle let me tell you about myself. BOOM! Sebastian Trashcan butts in. No; let me tell you about Billy Hamhead. Billy Hamhead is really mean, Sebastian Trashcan said. In fact he is so mean he will do anything to get what he wants; including violence, bad words, and anything. Billy Hamhead is also selfish, really dumb, and he is a knucklehead. What Billy Hamhead looks like is that he is a midget, he has dirty blonde hair, he is lazy, he is bad at everything except being mean, and wierd. Billy Hamhead had a gang. Billy Hamheads gangs name was the Hamheads. The gang had 5 members: Deija Brooks, Cadence Cordell, Ethan Wade, Sammie Cohen, and Maggie Stewart. The Hamheads gang had a fraternity. The gang had a gun hat, gun shirt, and gun shoes. Before I tell you about the battle let me tell you my opponent “Sebastian Trashcan”. Sebastian Trashcan is the king of good. Sebastian Trashcan also has a gang. The name; the Order of the Lion. The members of the Order of the Lion are: Darren Klein, Ave Walker, Ty Huneycutt, Jacob Murrie, and Jed Strickland. Like the Hamheads, the Order of the Lion also had a fraternity. The Order of the Lion has a Lion hat, a Lion shirt, and Lion shoes. The Order of the Lions motto is give me liberty. ARE YOU READY FOR THE BATTLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now everybody travels to Hamworld. Ready to fight. It is July 1,2059. The croaking of the pig was the only sound heard. Order of the Lion on the right; Hamheads on the right. The battle will begin...... after this commercial. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO Noah screamed I don’t like commercials. Now the real battle will begin. Darren Klein, Jed Strickland, and Jacob Murrie with bows and arrows for the Order of the Lion. Ty Huneycutt, Ave Walker, and Sebastian Trashcan with guns for the Order of the Lion. Deija Brooks, Cadence Cordell, and Ethan Wade with guns for the Hamheads. Julia Case, Sammie Cohen, and Billy Hamhead with bows and arrows or the Hamheads. 3,2,1 GOOOOOOOOO. Sammie immediately fires at Ave. Ave dies. Darren shoots at Deija. Deija dies. Jed fires at Cadence. Cadence jukes out the arrow. Jed fires again; but this time he hits. Cadence dies. Darren fires at Sammie. Sammie dies. Ty shoots at Ethan. Ethan dies. Julia shoots at Jacob. Jacob dies. Billy Hamhead shoots at Ty. Ty dies. Maggie shoots at Jed. Jed dies. Darren shoots at Julia; when Darren shoots Julia shoots at Darren. They both pass away. Sebastian Trashcan and Billy Hamhead are the only ones remaining. Sebastian Trashcan fires and misses. Billy Hamhead fires and barely misses. Sebastian Trashcan has one bullet left, Billy Hamhead has one arrow left. They both fire. Sebastian Trashcan jukes out the arrow; Billy Hamhead gets hit in the ankle. Billy Hamhead dies!!!!!!!!!!! The Order of the Lion win! Sebastian Trashcan is the King of Hamworld! So that is how we got the King of Hamworld. Now I will reveal the secrets about Billy Hamhead and Sebastian Trashcan....... after this commercial. NOOOOOOOOOOO Noah screamed, I abhor commercials! Now I will reveal the secrets. What you don’t know about Billy Hamhead was an animagus. An animagus is where you can be an animal at one point and a human at another. Billy Hamhead could turn into a beetle. What you didn’t know abou​t Sebastian Trashcan was that he was an animagus. He could turn into a grim. EVERYBODY THAT WAS ON THE ORDER OF THE LION HAS RISEN FROM THE DEAD!!!!!!



Candy Land By: Darren

“Vroom” George’s dad started the car. “Where are we going?” asked George. “To Candy Land!!” George’s dad replied. “Isn’t Candy Land floating on air near Olympus? “Yes, it is” George’s dad said. “How are we going to get there?” George asked “Easy,” George’s dad responded-whose real name is Bill-, “we have a flying car.” George was dumbfounded when he heard the news. “Aren’t we close already?” George queried, ”we live on 82nd Street and Candy Land is above 6th Street. “C’mon, get in the car, we are leaving” Bill said. “ But I don’t have any bags?” “ That’s why we are wizards,” Bill said, shocking his son, George. Chapter 2

“Can I invite Eli, Daniel, and Brandon to come with me?” George questioned his dad. “Sure, I’m sure they’ll have a good time in Candy Land.” George and Bill dialed them on their wand phones. They all answered and came over. “Whoa” Eli and Brandon said in chorus as they saw the flying car. They looked at Daniel. “Why weren’t you surprised?” Eli asked “Yeah, why?” Brandon said mimicking him. “Didn’t y’all know I was a wizard too?” Daniel responded. “Uh, no, we didn’t” They responded. “Sorry to interrupt the conversation, but does anybody has bags?” Bill asked. “No but I can poof my bags here.” Daniel said, bragging that he was a wizard. Just then my annoying neighbor José walked up and said: “What are you doing?” “Going to Candy Land” “Can I go?” José asked “NO!!!!!!” we all snapped at him José cried and walked home. When he got home he told his mother. His mother came over and said: “Let José come or else….” “Or else what?” Bill said, questioning her. She said, “I haven’t thought of that yet.” Her statement drew laughter from everybody. “I got it!!” She exclaimed, “A whole bag of mini Snickers. “Fine, he can come” Bill said “Yessss,” José said while doing his victory dance. The next thing we heard was “Oww” That was José’s terror scream. While José was doing his victory dance with his eyes closed, he crashed into a tree and broke his nose. Chapter 3

Blood was spewing everywhere from his nose. We called the Ambulance and they came and took José to the Hospital where he was operated on him and he delayed their trip by 4 days. George and his friends went to George’s house and played // Madden 10, Mario & Sonic at the Olympic Winter Games, and Little League World Series 2009 on Wii® // . They all slept over and ate Pizza and Ice Cream Sandwiches and Pancakes. When José got out of the hospital he did another victory dance, you know how that turned out. They played more video games and this time ate Neapolitan ice cream Klondike’s, Cheeseburgers and Waffles. Finally José got out of the hospital and DIDN’T do his victory dance, But he did manage to break his leg while he was walking from his car to his house. That delayed the trip by 3 weeks. This time they all slept over at Eli’s house. They finally decided to blow off José and just go to Candy Land. They went back to George’s house. Bill fired up the Toyota Sienna. He pushed a button and the wings popped out of the side of the gold Sienna. Eli is afraid of heights so we gave him a barf bag to throw up in. “Here we are, Candy Land 

Chapter 4

“Wow” everybody said in wonder as they saw Candy Land. “Let’s conquer the school first,” George said “YES,” Brandon said, “No school for anybody” “Great Idea’’ Bill said “Let’s go,” we all said laughing, and bouncing on the Jell-O streets “There it is” Daniel said. Daniel dove into the school tearing up the tootsie roll door. We all devoured the twizzler columns faster than Usain Bolt can run the 100m race. Eli and Daniel ate the office while Brandon and George ate the library. While they were resting in the lobby, they heard noises from the teachers lounge. “I think there is an observatory in the school, lets go check it out. They went and got a telescope to look under the door. They looked under and saw the lollipop aliens.

Chapter 5

Everybody got a look and then we went outside, and George searched on his iPhone “nearest weapon shop to Candy Land elementary school. They went to it and stole the whole shop full of weapons. The gang was walking around when Bill heard falling water. “Hey, lets go over there” he said pointing to the sounds. “Okay” said George, “Sounds good to me” Eli said, “Let’s go!” Brandon exclaimed. All the boys went to the sounds and saw a mansion with a waterfall coming out of the rectangular gap. Daniel was lugging the gear behind us. He set the stuff down and said “Hey guys! Do you want to go inside and check it out?” Eli responded “Yes! I would like to see what is in there.” The boys went inside and saw the most beautiful house they had ever seen. It was very peaceful inside. There were leather couches built into the walls. There were also multiple statues of the Founding Fathers and large flowery vases. “I'm hungry” Daniel said. “Then let's go see what's in the fridge” Eli said. They went to the fridge and saw lots and lots of beef ribs and bottles of barbeque sauce. The boys chowed down on the ribs until they could not eat any more. The boys went to go take a nap. They went into the master bedroom. There were two bunk-beds and one king-sized bed. The boys argued over which bed each should get. Bill said to George in private “Let your guests pick their beds first.” Eli, Brandon and Daniel each picked bunk-beds. Eli and Brandon slept on the same bunk bed, and Daniel and George slept on the other. Bill slept stretched out on the king-sized bed. They all slept until they heard barking outside. Eli looked out the window and saw the barking Lollipop Aliens. “Guys!” Eli said “You might want to come check out what's happening outside!!” The gang looked out the window, staring in disbelief. Daniel decided to get their weapons and go outside. Bill followed, along with the rest of the gang. They were armed with weapons when they got outside. The aliens fled when they saw Daniel's shotgun. Chapter 6 “Charge!!” Brandon hollered when he saw the aliens retreating. The boys chased after the aliens, and the aliens bounced along the jello streets back to their base, which is a marshmallow cloud. Daniel bounced up, but got caught on the bottom of the cloud, not able to catch the aliens. Bill got a crowbar from a nearby store, and pried Daniel down off the cloud. The aliens escaped, and hid from the warrior boys under their beds. After every day, the aliens move their base to a different cloud, so you never know where it is. The boys got angry not being able to catch the aliens, and went back to their base to work out a plan. When they got back to their falling water base, they were distracted and decided to play catch instead. After Eli threw the baseball to Brandon, he dropped it and it rolled under the bed. While Brandon was trying to get the ball, he saw a little red guy under the bed. Chapter 7 Brandon yelled “I can't find the ball!” All the boys came to try to help him find the baseball, and saw the red alien named Jacob. The boys convinced Jacob to come out, and asked him if he was an alien. Jacob responded with a faint “yes”. Jacob got over his shyness eventually, and decided to tell the boys something. He said “Guys, I'm one of the aliens that you were trying to defeat, but I am good. I never wanted to fight against you. That's why I hid under the bed. I thought you would never find me here; but you did. I know where their base is. We have electronic gadgets that tell us what we are doing. They just moved their base to the marshmallow cloud floating above the elementary school.” “

Thank you Jacob! That is useful information” the boys said. Then they went to bomb the aliens and defeat them. That was the plan they were thinking of the whole time. The boys quietly snuck over to the school where the aliens were. They bounced off the observatory and bombed the aliens. The aliens died and the remaining people decided to vote Jacob & George Co-Presidents of Candy Land. The boys lived in Candy Land for the rest of their lives, except for bi-weekly visits to Manhattan.